New Country Called Bloombergistan Joins Paris Agreement

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After the United States departed from the Paris Agreement last week, sources report that a brand new country called Bloombergistan has officially entered and ratified the international accord. Bloombergistan, housing a quaint population of 1, will provide up to $15 million to assist other struggling countries in their efforts to mitigate climate change.

“The government of Bloombergistan voted unanimously to join the Paris Agreement and contribute a sizable sum of money as well,” declared Bloombergistinian dictator Michael Bloomberg. Bloombergistan plans to collect the money by implementing a large tax raise across the country’s residents.

When the UNFCCC (United Nations Framework Convention on Climate Change) asked Bloombergistan to report their goals to mitigate climate change in their own country, Bloombergistan outlined a strong plan to encourage citizens to try to take some quicker showers and turn the lights off after leaving the room. Bloombergistan is considering asking Bloombergistinians to turn the water off while putting the toothpaste on the toothbrush and eating turkey instead of roast beef as well.

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