Cleveland, OH – In an amazing display of selflessness, area woman Carrie “Car” Nivore proudly declared that if meat didn’t taste so damn good, she would immediately go vegan. Environmentalists around the world are applauding Nivore’s bold stance stating her utmost intent to pursue a vegan diet and unfortunate inability due to the delicious flavor of meat. “The agriculture industry causes ten percent of global greenhouse gas…

Sources report that yesterday morning, Nebraska cattle farmer Pat T. Uvryce decided emphatically to take a stand to protect the environment. After waking up and reading an article on Facebook about how cows produce methane from their digestion process, Uvryce realized that he needed to make change. Rather than just sitting on his couch and eating kale chips, Uvryce took initiative by marching outside and…

April 22, 2017 – Sources report that today wasn’t the best of Earth Days for area man Corey Ander after he allegedly released copious amounts of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere during his Earth Day cookout. Using a charcoal grill, Ander sent around a dozen pounds of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, the equivalent of a 22 mile car drive….