Quiz: Which Climate Anxiety Coping Mechanism Are You?

Wildfires, extreme heat, sea level rise, extreme storms. How do you react to climate change? Find out your climate anxiety coping mechanism.

Cartoon woman hugging her knees against a blue background.

We at The Sweaty Penguin understand that climate change can feel overwhelming at times. While this site can be a great way to avoid doom-and-gloom, think critically, and explore possible solutions, not all climate content takes the same approach. Try our quiz and find out which climate anxiety coping mechanism you are.

  1. 1 The Wildfire season is even worse this year. What are you blaming it on?

    1. I should have recycled that extra plastic bottle. Why did I even buy it in the first place? I am the worst.
    2. Oh god. I forgot to charge my moon crystals last night. That's why half my state is glowing red-hot.
    3. Wildfires? Those are supposed to happen anyway. I’m sure it’s fine.
    4. Well, honestly, there are a lot of complex factors at play. We should invest in better adaptation measures to keep these things at bay.
  2. 2 It’s 60 degrees in December again. In Minneapolis. How are you going to spend the day?

    1. I’ll wear this necklace I got in some high-end thrift shop. The lady says it keeps your skin safe from the sun and your mind safe from cultural appropriation 🙂
    2. I’m pacing around my room, trying to sweat out enough moisture to fix the oddly dry climate for this time of year.
    3. Look, it’s probably not the best sign that weather is getting more sporadic, and it’s a good reminder to maybe call a representative about helping pass better environmental protections, but I still shouldn’t waste a nice day. Let’s have a picnic!
    4. Nice! Perfect day for a long drive to the beach. I’m filling up my land rover and getting straight to the good times.
  3. 3 Your favorite animal, the (very real) polka-dotted whole foods sparrow, was just declared critically endangered.

    1. That is really upsetting. I’m probably gonna take a day to process this news, but maybe after that I can donate to a wildlife preserve, and voice my concerns to local environmental agencies.
    2. That’s it. Hand the birds over to me. I’m quitting my job and getting this species back on the map since nobody else is doing anything about it.
    3. Animals? Ehhhh who even needs ‘em. They’re just like dumber humans with more hair, and we can act just as cute in internet videos.
    4. I’m throwing a candlelight vigil ceremony with three of my friends. We’re burning in my living room and just hoping it doesn’t spread to anywhere else in the house.
  4. 4 You just read a report that a massive glacier is experiencing record melting this year.

    1. I don’t know which report you’re talking about.
    2. Panic and start to blow on the earth as fast as you can. Maybe that will cool it down!!! Should I start ripping out the pavement in front of my house?
    3. I know that glacier loss can be devastating, but I also know that things are happening on a much larger scale than I can control right now. I try to focus on the small things I know I can control and listen to really great informative and lighthearted content to keep me on the right path.
    4. My communal garden isn’t doing enough. Time to allow my organic okra plants to invade the neighbors yard and convert them to veganism against their will. Muahahaha.
  5. 5 Yet another “once in a lifetime” weather event has happened in your home state. What are you doing to help the survivors?

    1. I’ll share an article about butthole sunning to my Instagram followers, and share a personal anecdote that my family will never be able to unread.
    2. People are probably fine with freezing rain in August. It sounds familiar.
    3. I’ll donate to a mutual fund, and spread awareness about how important the national weather service can be.
    4. Start walking my 12 mile commute to work. I can make it if I wake up at 4:30!
  6. 6 You read an article about the new projected sea level rise over the next 5 years.

    1. I can probably blame vaccines for this, somehow…
    2. Take a deep breath, recognize that we can still remain hopeful, and maybe listen to an episode of the Sweaty Penguin Podcast.
    3. Ehhh, who really needs Florida anyway? We can gain a foot or two of water.
    4. Start. Drinking.

Quiz: Which Climate Anxiety Coping Mechanism Are You?

Created on
  1. Quiz result

    You definitely cope with toxic individualism.

    Take a few deep breaths, and remember that there are 100 companies that are responsible for 71% of global emissions, so the blame might not all be on you.

    Share Your Result
  2. Quiz result

    You fall into the obsessive (and appropriative) spiritual category.

    If you really love mindfulness, make sure you’re mindful of the cultures that your crystal collection comes from. And maybe use the full moon as an excuse to call your representative, too.

    Share Your Result
  3. Quiz result

    You’re clearly in denial.

    Whether it’s intentional or unintentional, you are blatantly ignoring the climate crisis. It might be helpful to talk to the next person on this list.

    Share Your Result
  4. Quiz result

    I’m in love with you.

    You clearly care deeply for the environment, and also carry a nuanced understanding of what makes climate activism sustainable. I might even go far enough as to say you are a Sweaty Penguin listener. Please let me have your children.

    Share Your Result

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Maxwell Pociask
Maxwell Pociask is a Boston University Sophomore originally from Urbana, Illinois. He is a comedy writer for The Sweaty Penguin, helping to squeeze those juicy little joke morsels into that sweet, sweet, podcast news, baby. Max also publishes articles and other website content for The Sweaty Penguin, drawing on his past experience writing for The Bunion. Max also works as an Opinions section editor for the Daily Free Press, where you can read his column on unique urbanist solutions found in small American towns. He’s had a lifelong passion for building sustainable and equitable communities, and in 2021 hosted a grant-funded arts showcase for students in Central Illinois. Max doesn’t think that pineapple on pizza is all that big of a deal, but hopes you don’t tell Ethan about that.


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